The "Ogre's Castle" and the Patient's Fears
In the basement of his north London home, Mike Brearley, the former England cricket captain, has spent 42 years practising as a psychoanalyst. As he sat in his consulting room, he recalled a patient who once described the place as the "Ogre's Castle," not because of its austere appearance among pastel-painted neighbours, but out of an unfounded fear of him. This patient had darkly joked that she thought he might "eat her or something," a comment highlighting the apprehension even willing patients might feel toward psychoanalysis.
Balancing Fame and Psychoanalysis
Brearley, now 82 and soft-spoken, dressed comfortably in slippers and socks with fried eggs, seems an unlikely figure to inspire such fears. Despite his gentle demeanour, he was often viewed with suspicion. His teammates once regarded him as too intellectual, an academic trying to juggle a cricketing career. As his cricket career wound down, and he trained to become a psychoanalyst, he faced scepticism from those who viewed him merely as a sportsman.
Fame posed its challenges in his second career. Psychoanalytic tradition encourages therapists to maintain a neutral presence, allowing patients to project their emotions onto them. However, for Brearley, the renowned cricket captain known for leading England to three Ashes victories, remaining a "blank slate" was complicated. He recounted how some patients, aware of his cricketing fame, reacted differently—some saw it as a plus, while others, particularly women, questioned his ability to understand them, dismissing him as a "little boy playing games."
The Personal Life
Brearley’s nuanced understanding of human nature extended to his cricket leadership. Known for his ability to read people, he balanced his fierce competitiveness on the field with a gentlemanly off-field persona. His leadership skills earned high praise from cricketing greats like Ian Botham and Geoff Boycott, who admired his ability to support and restrain them as needed.
Despite being a solitary figure, often dining alone or sightseeing while others relaxed, Brearley maintained a deep interest in cricket. However, he seldom visited Lord's, the home of cricket, preferring to watch matches on television to avoid being cornered by fans. He expressed concerns about the future of Test and County Championship cricket, fearing it was being marginalised.
Brearley has particularly admired the recent duels between Jimmy Anderson and Virat Kohli, considering Anderson the best swing bowler he has ever seen. Reflecting on Anderson's career, Brearley mused about how different his statistics might have been under his own captaincy, suggesting more aggressive field settings and bowling strategies.
His life off the pitch has been equally rich and complex. Born in Harrow and raised in Ealing, Brearley excelled in both academics and sports, attending the City of London School and later Cambridge University. His father, a practical and no-nonsense maths teacher, was a significant influence, despite Brearley's broader philosophical interests.
Brearley’s fascination with the mind led him to the Samaritans and a stint as a nursing assistant, experiences that shaped his understanding of human psychology. His academic journey eventually led him to psychoanalysis, influenced by his interest in how people can misunderstand their own thoughts.
Brearley attributes part of Ben Stokes’ success as England’s current Test captain to his empathetic leadership, shaped by personal struggles. Brearley himself was drawn to psychoanalysis by a realisation that his own life was more complex than it seemed. He described facing anxiety about public performance and challenges in social interactions, areas he delved into deeply in his psychoanalytic practice.
Despite his public persona, Brearley has been protective of his private life. His first marriage to American academic Virginia Hjelmaa ended in divorce, and he later married Mana Sarabhai, whom he met through her mother, a psychoanalyst. The couple shares a rich family history, with connections to India's independence movement and the country's scientific community.
Brearley continues to balance his interests in cricket, psychoanalysis, and family life. He spends part of each year at a family farm in India and remains engaged with his four grandchildren. As he contemplates retirement, he acknowledges the challenges of ageing, including concerns about dementia, a disease that affected both his parents.
Reflecting on his life, Brearley quotes his philosophical hero, Ludwig Wittgenstein, who near death expressed contentment with a life well-lived. Brearley’s journey, marked by intellectual curiosity, leadership, and empathy, has indeed been a remarkable and well-examined life.